mayb..
somehow...
being cold is jz a way 2 protect myself..

had a talk v shan jz nw..
i din really notice tat i WAS actually seems like d centre point b4..
ya..
u r right..
WAS...is past tense..
thgs do change..
memories do fade away...
n so do I..
bt...
she reminded me one thg..
whn i'm in d -ve mode..
who ever msg me?
who ever concern bout it?
n only i realize...there's NOBODY ..
kinda pathetic right?

there's no such thg tat u get accordingly to wat u give...
ppl might even c u as a clown for being such generous..

it especially hurt me whn Shan told me wat a particular fren of mine ans her bac whn she was telling him i was in bad mood yest...
I was once his listener..
ya..
ONCE...

n til nw, i stil think i hav did d right thg..
nt being listener...
wat u gain for being a gd listener..
u dig ur precious time to listen, n even to help them solve..
bt...

by the end, u only get d ans
"it's nt the 1st time..so jz let it be.."

i heard my heart was freezing..
getting cold..
full of disappointment..
n i've learnt my lesson..
thx for giving me d chance to grow...


bt...
anyway..
had a great day today v darling Vivian...
thx for being there dear..
went for The Ugly Truth..n had some chats...
its such a relieve whni c her..
cz tis whole day b4 i meet her i was SooO moody..
bt whn i c her..
it's hard 2 describe..
bt..
thx for being there dear..
Luv u soOo much...


told him bout my feel..n i think i've hurt him..
sry..........

Isolated

d overall che ling at PTUM opening ceremony was getting +ve feedback..
bt..
my part..
i din badly..
suppose to b d most confident act..
yet..
i failed doin it...
and..
d other part..where i was too nervous..
nothg was great..
haiz..
sob sob..

d feeling is coming bac again..
n i think i'm jz too use to it until i can even be alone nw..
in my room..

being isolated...
is jz so normal to me nw..
normal until I can even say it straight to them..
they might take it as a joke..
bt..
deep inside me..
the sensitive me do feel it...
bt luckily i stil gt Shan..
d sha po goin crazy v me...haha~

mayb it's my fault for not being updated..
not listening 2 modern songs, not following dramas, not playing d same game, not having d same interest...

n i'm convincing myself..
we live for nobody..
ya..
frens, roommates r really important..
bt..
so wat?
U stil will b left behind although hw high profile u are..

and I HATE waiting..
i jz dun understand why..
why some ppl can b jz "mo"?
i admit..
me myself is oso nt tat puncture..
bt ...
haiz..
i jz dunno hw 2 describe them...
speechless.....fed up...

bt goin 2 let it be...

sometimes...
its jz better 2 stay at d position of frens a.k.a bro...
stil in da process of coping in it....

random

well..
i have nt updated my blog 4 quite some time..
hehe...
so..
gotta b active a bit more...

nothg much 2 say..
jz another count down mood to d comin Deepavali holiday, thn Final, thn HOLIDAYS again..wakaka~~

starting class tml..
which i m nt in mood at all..

did nothg d whole day except reading novel..
haiz..
wasted one day doin nothg..
except day dreaming..sms-ing..facebook-ing..n sleeping...lolz..

I Love Holidays..
bt dunno y it always ended so fast..

tis holiday was kinda blur..
din even noe wat i did, n here comes Mon..

went 2 USJ to say bye bye 2 Chung on Thurs and stayed there til Monday..
went bac home on Monday..
reached home..
thn went yumcha v Jia Hen..
thn next day, bein a gd gal at home..
house renovation..
help my mum 2 clean d house..
bt i din do anythg much..
thn went melaka v Raymond n King Fong
(1st time getting "green" pau frm Sabrina's mum)
thn yumcha v kang wen n cher shin..
n the next thg...
*POP*..
i'm on d bus..
on my way bac 2 KL..
haiz...

bt..

somethg changed....
after a phone called..

(wil upload some picx later ya..)

Marketing...(what a joke..)

A professor was explaining marketing concepts to the Students:-

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say:
"I am very rich. Marry me!" -That's Direct Marketing

2. You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeous girl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says:
"He's very rich. Marry him." -That'sAdvertising

3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day, you call and say:
"Hi, I'm very rich. Marry me." -That'sTelemarketing

4. You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. You get up and
straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car) for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her a ride and then say: "By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" -That'sPublic Relations

5. You're at a party and see a gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: "You are very rich! Can you marry me?" -That's Brand Recognition

6. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say:
"I am very rich. Marry me!" She gives you a nice hard slap on
your face. -That'sCustomer Feedback

7. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say:
"I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her
husband. -That's demand and supply gap

8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything; another person comes and tells her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him -That'scompetition eating into your market share

9. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich, Marry me!" your wife arrives. -That's restriction for entering new markets

finally...
a little bit time 4 me 2 update my blog...
hmm...
jz 2 amend my mistakes, d harsh words for d previous blog,...

I DO ENJOY THE CC trip...

Can u imagine wat happen on our way?haiyo..cham...


On d ferry..on our way 2 Pulau Pangkor..


together v the juniors...





On our way 2 Snorkling....


After Snorkling..


The SS CC board..haha

After praying...

(d day b4 cc trip)

11-9-2009

Wanted to blog..
bt there's no wifi in tis stupid college..purposely walk to d bus stop outside 4th alone jz to blog..
UM,so call d best uni in malaysia..
v d lousy maintenance,awful memories i had durin sharing room..
i wonder y they stil can say tat UM is one..

Wasnt in gd mood nw..thgs were all nt on my side after ptb

feel like crying..my tears r rolling in my eyes..
wiped it of,yet d feelings r comin again..
hate to b alone..hate d quietness whn there's no1 around me..

tonight i'm sleeping alone..HT went bac cz of her tooth pro,dunno wat happen to nik..
din really wanna talk to me bout 2 days dy..even wonder wat i've done to make her react like tis to me..giving excuse tat she's tired n x wanna join us4 sing k,on d other hand went sg wang..thn overnight at gui ying's place..
i bet she dun even wanna tell me @ d 1st place..n jz giving me d notification durin night time..i jz dun understand..
y all my friendship r so fragile..it jz disconnected so easily..n i really nid to learn to jz take it easy..dont take thgs such serious..
keep convincing myself tat there's really no true frens..nobody can really b there for u whn u nid them..

I'm really x in da mood of goin CC Trip..
none of my gang were goin..
there's only ah xian which can really accompany me..
asking me wat bout raymond n king fong?i bet they r surely busy entertaining forest..
There's only both of us..

Din really notice tat i'm such a "responsible" person..
jz bcz there's nobody goin,me as d committe in the board..shall join..
Paying Rm100 to fake my smile is kinda "good" price for me..

Recalling d list who r goin to d cc trip makes my mood even worst..
Hate goin to trip which i dun hav gang..

Even gave up d flight to Sabah last holiday jz bcz of no gang..d flight i've ady booked,d plan,d journey we hav planned..i can even give up..wat makes tis CC TRIP such important? wt*

Jz praying hard..hopefully i can get some fun..jz some..i din ask for more..i din expect i can really enjoy oso..

Lesson learnt:
Never say "Mostly" whn u r x sure..
Never take responsibility whn u cant commit..
Never believe in frens4eva..
Never ever beg ppl goin2 any places whn they hav ady decided for x goin..u r only wasting ur time!
Never make decisions that will make u regrets!

Life is bitter whn d progress of learning is indescribable v words..

left behind...

the sensitive me is appearing A.G.A.I.N...

jz dun understand myself sometimes..
spoiling ppl's mood..
making d environment so cold...

n i'm blaming 4 all d accumulated feelings tat i had frm wat i felt since last time...

hope everythg wil b fine....

it's my week tis week...
*winks~~*

i hav recover...
no more fever..
no more sick..
n i'm no more a suspect for H1N1 case..lolz..

hehe~~

n d most important thg is....

I GOT BACK MY ROOM!!

^C110^

*hurray~*

tat was d BEST part..
after so long time of suffering...
can u imagine tat u gotta wait for ur time 2 slp?
u gotta wake up whn some1 is awake..
ur nap u gotta b alert whether some1 wants to slp too?
u gotta HUNT for place to study and for ur assgmt?

NO!!

tis is wat i hav been been through for almost two months!
thx god...

I GOT MY ROOM BAC~~

yahoo~~

i was so excited until everyone around me noes tat we gt our room bac..
haha~~
skipped d tiring cleaning part and d 1st night in C110 was soOOOoo

~~COMFORTABLE~~
hehe...

C110..i LOVE YOU!!